Its the thots that counts

Suasana hari Jumaatpagi( 8 mei 2009)

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And maryam came back yelling..Mama!..Mama!...lagi beberapa hari...hari Ibu...I Love u Mama...

(And any mum's heart wd surely melt....)

Maryam: Mama, Kat book shop skola ade jual bunga..Iym ingat nak beli untuk mama..mama suka?..

Mama:..oo..mustilah..( sambil kehairanan...hadiah surprise dah kasi tahu 'in advance')

Maryam :...Nanti duit seringgit, Iyam tak mau guna....mama jgn lupa bekalkan air penuh...Iyam tak mau belanja....( sambil berlari ke bilik air..bersiap untuk ke skola..)

Suasana petang Jumaat

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Mama: Hai Iyam...ape kabar?

Maryam : Mama!..Iyam ade hal sket nak cakap laa..

mama : Nape la pulak

maryam: Iyam dah beli bunga tu..tapi bila dalam bas , ade kakak djh 2 mintak tukar bunga tu dengan sepit rambut..harga 30sen...Iyam kata okey lah..tapi dlm hati sedih jugak..Tapi kelmarin , Sarah dah pesan jangan bergaduh dengan kaka2 besar..jadi Iyam kasi jelahbunga pada kakak tu...tak pe lah..Iyam letak sepit ni kat bekas kaca mama eh!!...

Mama:..(..Why some people so mean.....!!)

Mama and maryam hug each other..

Mama: Tak pe sayang..ape-ape pun...mama terima..yg buat mama lebih happy bila anak2 mama ingat pada mama...dan lagi satu..lain kali Iyam kena berani pertahankan hak Iyam...tak payahlah lagi kasi barang2 pada orang lain...( And wonder..kalau dia faham atau tidak..as she is a very nice gal...gosh....loooks like I have another homework..to teach my daughter lessons of life...)..Mama loves u sayang!!!!

I guess...entah skil ape lagi nak ajar pada my small maryam....bukan sekali..ade a few times gak..dia dengan senang hati...bagi duit belanja kat kawan2 dia...bagi pensil warna dan entah ape lagi..(Kita bukannya hidup mewah sangat sayang oii.....mama tak kerja..ayah..ibarat kais pagi..makan pagi...kena lah jimat juga...)...and I dont really like the idea of bully...if that fits the word...cd it be my daughter tak pandai menggunakan kuasa atau kawan2 dia dengan mudah ambil kesempatan...entah lah..what to say..what to say..( aku dulu tak pandai lak nak minta tukar barang2 orang..)

Suasana malam Jumaat..sebelum tidor
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Maryam: Mama..mama nak lagi tak bunga cam tu?...cantik tau..ade teddy bear dan kad bentuk 'love'...

Mama:..Tak pe lah Yam..it is ok...

Maryam: HAri Isnin kalau ade jual lagi kat Book shop..Iyam nak beli lagi lah!..

(..O..Tuhan..lihatlah anak ku ini....)

Maryam..(merengek manja sebelum terlena tido...): Ma...bila gigi Iyam dua depan ni nak tumbuh?.....Si Iskandar tu suka ejek ..Iyam rongak!..

Mama:..Dah lah Iyam....ambik masa gigi nak tumbuh....kena minum susu banyak...dan biarlah SiIskandar tu..jgn layan sangat..

Maryam: ..tulis nota kat kertas..(."Ayah, jgn lupa beli fresh milk lagi esok...)...kasi pada mama..untuk di beri pada ayah...and she dozed off...

Maisarah:..Mama..Sarah sayang mama jugak....and tertido jugak....

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Small matters...big impact to myheart...
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Happy mother's day to all mumies out there...to their mummies too...

p/s: Writer misses her 2 eldest daughters very much..and off course she can;t help but to remember a person so wonderful in her life...her late mum..who peacefully left her and siblings plus late father(who follow suit in 2002) like 11 years ago...a month after coming back from umrah...2 days before 1998 Eidul fitri....Mak...(Monawa Abdul Wahid..a.k.aEsah)..Alfatihah...tears roll down....

on 5th march

Then : Maryam 3 months old

Ok..my dear Maryam yang masih lagi manja....here is ur turn lak...hari tu mama wish bday untuk Sarah..so here...:

Now: Maryam 7 years old

Happy 7th Birthday my little princess..( though not little anymore..)...

All our prayers darling sweet....Kenang Daku Dalam Doamu juga....

Used to be the youngest..she is especially known for one who wants to be first all the time..even if when we're back from outing...she'd quickly ran down from the car and stand in front of the door to be unlocked...Once ayah sengaja nak nyakat dia..and ayah stood infront of her...not letting her in..and she merajuk all night..no night-night kiss for ayah..( shian tol!)..Also..Kak Long pun turun berlari-lari sama nak ddiri depan pintu...and she kalah..dan merajuk nangis..juga...aduhai...ramai lak yang suka menyakat nih!

Also, in a car, she at times wd complain..why wd the motorcylist always infront of our car..at traffic..and ayah kata..laa....itu pun tak boleh kah?..Shian ayah yg hari2 pi kerja naik motor...

KNowing kids..like to 'berlumba'...I think she is so like that...in class..in school's concert...she normally make sure follow the rule one....one thing ..ok lah..good fighting spirit..on another thing..slow down sayang....becoz she'd got frustrated..and cengeng if things turn the other way round..

And she is as helpful as Maisarah too...cuma kekadang basuh pinggan..ade mengelat sket!!..also...so sayang the baby boy...waa...a caring sistah!

And Maisarah sometimes said, why ma....kalu mama tanya sarah soalan..dia pun nak jawab....hihi!!

I guess...she just doesn't want to be left out...would u agree???..We all love u Maryam...Celebration later ok!!

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Received cal from Klong juga...syukur..

M1 : Mama, guess what..kakak kat stadium larkin..

Mama : Huh! Wat ape tu?

M1: yeay..yeay..baru menang gold medal lontar peluru sukan skola men daerah jb.....sorry ma..stf kalah!!...tapi ..skola kitorang tak dpt masuk final bola jaring ( she is playing GD under-15)..kalah ngan S.e.t.a...sebelum dpt lawan stf..ooo..yess..sukan skolah tahun ni..rumah akak menang..rumah hijau.....( yes..go green go.....sama ngan mama juga....)

Mama:.waa.....Alhamdulillah...what's next?(..she ..so..like to compare her school with mine..tak pe lah...kasi can..)

M1: Ade schedule untuk msd..if lepas..mssj...

Mama:..woit..sukan sakan lak...so how do u feel..

M1: best sgt ma...and now tengah enjoy tengok acara lari-lari...kuat gak dak stf...tapi akak lebih thrill tengok abang-abang lari-lari...dan rsa mcm dpt rase ape yang mama cerita..zaman mama sibuk ikut orang pi stadium larkin...makan ais krim roti kongsi2...cuci2 mata...

mama:....@#???....amboi!...hahaha!!..( yeap..I used to love following my school frens to the stadium..watching sports event...alahai..tak kira asal dpt outing lah!..and I was never good in sports too...I survived hockey team just few first month of form one..issh..tak larat lari satu padang hoki weh!!....and selalu ponteng gi latihan hoki petang2 lepas prep....lama2 senior pun drop le mama...tak leh pakai hihi!!..and one more thing that I hate most during my secondary sch years was to run around the school compound....satu penyeksaan...)..and I do believe only those with big hearts that cd pump in much more oxygen wd excel in sports...plus those who hae extra special muscle..leg or hand etc...

M1:..Mama, nanti akak cal lagi eh!..tata...lov. so much

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and I love today!....gd night you all....I am much better in spirit!!

Just the four of us..

It was raining like cats and dogs outside...and time was running fast..

"going or not?"...." can we make it?"..

We only have each other..actually three.. because the little one is not independent yet!!.

Maisarah and maryam , each has their own agenda..own wish list....

Whereas mama...the grocery list..must count in..her favourite beverage..( mind u...breast feeding does not stop me from enjoying it!...nescafee....Hi Ch' Ani of Irshad......buzz me if u read this!)..

I had to bathe my baby first..so that I won't be that tired after coming back from the shop...

WE desperately need to go to the shop just to buy some few important and must buy things...ayah has to be excused...( while I am writing this, ayah is still in his office..struggling for the dateline..I presume...)..

Earlier on, maryam was given the task to jot down the list while Maisarah finishing her last bit of bm homework....

I opened the gate, started the engine..put baby beside me...(alamak..dah start nangis pulak..)

M3 switched off the lights, tv, the fan and locked the door..

M4 held the main gate..

And baby cried..all the way.....(aduhai!!!)

Arrived at the shop shortly...put the baby next to my shoulder..( oh..nasib baik dan tak nangis..)

The 2 girls helped me with all the things needed....mama paid at the counter while baby started to cry again....( he wanted to sleep....laaa...tadi mama puas dodoi kat rumah ..tak mau tido'..sabar je lah...)..and he made everyone in the shop looked at us as if it was one of the heavy drama scene...M3 and m4 carried all the groceries beg..

I had to singgah kedai Kak Mah too..just to get my favourite curry mee...and Kmah greeted baby:

"Baby...awatnya nangis ni..laparg kah????..."..

Then we had to stop by the stationery shop ..(ape lagi..budak2 ni..nak beli colour lah..pemadam lah....etc..kunun semua dah exhaustive..next week ujian bulanan...kena ready alat tulis....)

Quickly we went back...and alhamdulillah..we made it home despite few obstacles...

All mama wanted to say here is : thx so much to my two little girls...

I used to think they are still small..especially when the two eldest came back from their school...

But now...I know I can depend on them.....Alhamdulillah...I am so grateful...I am not alone getting through all this having-new-baby experience..

And perhaps..that is also the reason..ayah knows I can handle the situation...(though at times rasa macam ibu tunggal lak...and the least I wanted to do is to burden him with the groceries' list either)...he is the breadwinner....(amboi..naik manja lah yeee....u shd be lucky la ayah..never see u iron baju lagi sekarang jugak...and lemak berkati-kati..bertepu-tepu...)..ooh..yes...and ayah had to stay back to make up for the days he took mc few days ago..fell of from his bike...left some scars and bruises....( oo..my....Allah is so grateful..He still make my hubby..safe and sound..alhamdulillah..even though kaki terdengkot-dengkot....)..and I just do not want to think of the other way round..not yet!!...

It was just a small test...to see my other half in pain...not so him...

That remind me of my friend 'Helza'...she is a strong woman....taking care of her 4 boys...alone...but I know and pray ..Allah showers her with all His strengths and Kindness...I had one posting for her somewhere in 2008 : this

Remind me of ayah's pesan..: "Kalu boleh..minta tolong dengan anak-anak..mana yang boleh..."..He knows very well..that I am the type who like to do everything by myself....never want to bother others....(pas tu bila penat..tensen lah pulak!!)

Leaving me with smile in my heart..eventhough I miss our family time..but we still have each other to offer help..to ease...

Tata! I hope you all have smile (plural) in your heart this weekend..