We are aging..I am aging too..

I gave birth to my 5th child when I was just 40.( a few months away!)

For some, age is just a number...And are expected to grow maturely...( There goes my savings too..it is supposed to get matured?...)

At 40, ( many would agree..esp to someone non-sporty like me)..I do find some routine a bit strenuous...I cd sense and feel the difference..comparatively to some 10-15 years ago.

Raising up toddler at this age is lot more challenging....The difference is maybe..I am more calm now...more relax...shhoo away my moody episodes..

But my major hiccups few months back is my eyesight. The pic (on the right) was taken almost one and a half years back..and now, I think it is deteriorating..

Reading is a must with spectacle..If not, I wd have to hold the material about 2 feet away..My siblings/relatives wd laugh at my holding my cellphone that 'away' just to read an sms text or who's the caller..

Whenever we'r eating out for family dinner..I am not as quick as bfore..Still I have to do ordering..i am as dominant as ever!!.To read the menu, shall need my glasses..And to eat as well...It is just funny to wear a magnifying glass just to have a clear pic of what one is eating..And cutting my boy's nails...and searching for my gals' 'lice'..( yeah..no joking....those small tinny Winny things mum do!)

Nowdays..to enjoy my tuition time with my kids..is at times miserable!!..Hey kids...mama still can read, okey! Could you all do me favour, pls, please tell your daddy to get me a good reading glass...Would u? 

Again..it is aging..And why make such a fuss about it...I still have my other sense working perfectly..Alhamdulillah...

p/s: I was supposed to buy formula milk with 'honey' for my boy..but when I came home, It was a 'chocolate' flavour...( preety sure I cd differentiate between the photo of a bee and a choc?)..Oh my...oh my...

Longing for 'me' time?.. Permissible?

He..he..

I found this 'old' book while doing housekeeping..

I read pages by pages..it describes almost everything..about the role, duties, rights and obligations..of a woman, single and married...

What captures me most was the way it describes how importance role of a mother in upbringing her child..not easy though but it is so simple and straight forward...that I began to think....oowwh..there is so plenty of rooms for improvement...ask all mums, all want to do the best and be the best..but at times its just not feasible to do all...And at this point, I think, we need best supports, right?..But imagine, if supports are at no avail...it will disrupt the equilibrium...And I am rambling....and not kidding either?

That brings me to those 'unproductive' time...for all 'unexecuted plans'..

And after all the thinking...don't u think we, mums, deserve, her 'me' time...Is it permissible?..

Sayang emak..sayang Musalmah..Happy mum's day!

Happy Mother's Day....

Setiap tahun..bahkan setiap hari...saya dilimpahi kaseh sayang dari anak2..dengan cara mereka tersendiri...tahun ni, anak2 yang dekat bagi 'present'...kad..dan yg jauh itu...sempat gak telepon...

Eemm...nak cerita panjang tapi masa sangat suntuk....

Tapi sudah pasti saya akan teringat pada arwah Emak....Saya tahu anak2 saya pun begitu terutama Kak Moon, mungkin juger KMas..kerana yg lain2 hadir setelah emak pulang ke rahmatullah....DAn sudah itu kehendakNYa..Pasti itu yang terbaik buat arwah mak dan kami semua...walaupun setiap saat saya merinduinya...Saya kira itu hadiah paling bermakna...tetapi setakat 30 tahun sahaja....DAn jikalau sana siini orang memperkatakan tentang dasyatnya doa ibu..

Saya rasa kekurangan...tetapi saya yakin....emak akan datang memeluk dan mendengar segala rintihan melalui rahmat kaseh sayang Allah...Semuga Allah menempatkan arwah Mak bersama para solihin...Dan " aku mohon Ya Rabbi..agar Engkau jadikan aku anak yang soleh..agar doa2ku dapat menerangi perbaringan arwah emak..."..Serta..Janganlah Engkau biarkan aku seorang diri Ya Rabbi..Setelah Engkau ambil kaseh sayang arwah bondaku..Aku hanya menggantungkan harap padaMu"

Bila arwah mak dah tak de....saya ade satu lagi pilihan..iaitu Mak Mertua....

DAlam Radio IKIM kelmarin, sempena hari ibu...Dr Fadhilah Kamsah kata.." seorang isteri mesti sanjung , kaseh dan sayang pada Ibu Mertua mereka...lebih (kalu tidak sama) dari ibu kandung sendiri...."

DAn saya diam terpaku..walaupun sedang memandu...Saya kira..ade banyak lagi peluang yang saya belum ambil..banyak lagi ruang kosong untuk saya penuhi..banyak lagi hati yang saya belum 'jaga' sepenuhnya..SesungguhNya hati kita semua milik Yang Esa...

Masihkah ade hari esok utk saya terus menyemai budi pada anak2 dan IbuMertua..?..Saya berasa penat dan lemas dalam pelbagai harapan..saya harap, saya dapat yakinkan pada anak2 saya bahawa hidup ini adalah satu ujian dari Allah, orang2 yang berjaya adalah mereka yang dapat melalui kehidupan ini dengan kejayaan dan sentiasa tunduk kepada ketetapan-ketetapan Allah..

Selamat Hari Ibu semua!..Khas buat Ibu Mertuaku..(biarpun engkau mungkin tidak betah melihat tulisan ini)..Puan Salmah Bachik..Sayang Mak..Sayang Musalmah...